STARTING YOUR DAY RIGHT - PART 3

Article By
KAYSOON KHOO

When you've recited to yourself that magical formula before the mirror, you've put yourself in the right frame of mind. Sustain it while you’re taking your bath, preparing your breakfast and getting dressed for work. The longer you maintain that buoyant spirit, the more it intensifies, and the longer it stays with you.

How do you keep that good feeling alive? Do something spontaneous, like singing or humming a tune under your breath as you go about your little tasks. Be careful what song you pick when you fill your head with music. Let it be one with a happy connotation. Songs and their lyrics leave subtle impressions in our minds. Look at the lyrics of hymns and religious songs. Why do you think they are composed in that special way?

If you don’t know any appropriate songs, hum “Jingle Bells”. Never mind if it’s June; that little ditty is replete with happy connotations. Or let a lilting tune run through your head whenever you get a dose of what is known as “the blues”. If you’ve ever heard Mantovani’s rendition of the Swedish Rhapsody, you’ll know that some tunes literally make the heart dance.

I’m not going overboard in insisting that you sing or hum the right kind of song. Music hath charms, but it can swing your emotions either way. There’s a particular oldie composed and recorded by Simon and Garfunkle way back in the sixties, with lyrics that go:

A winter’s day, in a deep and dark December.

I am alone, gazing from my window to the streets below,
On a freshly fallen, silent shroud of snow.
I am a rock, I am an island.

Look at the words – deep and dark December, I am alone, silent shroud of snow, I am an island! The implication is that the singer is strong because he cuts himself off from the rest of humanity! If that’s so, why did someone assert that “no man is an island”?

What MOOD does the song try to put you in? It gets even worse in another verse :

And I have no need of friendship;

Friendship causes pain.
It’s laughter and it’s loving I disdain.
I am a rock, I am an island.

These are messages you DON’T want to relay to your inner self! That’s why I’m saying you can’t just sing ANY song to lighten up your spirits. Simon and Garfunkle’s “I am a Rock” isn’t tailored to make you feel happy. It’s meant to do the OPPOSITE. The lyrics are the outpourings of someone who’s given up on life, love and himself! How do you think your mind will respond if you keep planting within it the ideas suggested in that song? Stick to Jingle Bells.

Another thing you can do to preserve that happy feeling is to insert into your mind a picture of someone, the very thought of whom gives you a warm glow inside – someone you love very much. That person could be your child, who’s still in his cot, fast asleep – your wife, who’s in the hospital, recovering from an operation – your good friend, who’s gone overseas to advance his job prospects – your grandfather, who’s dead, but whom you’ll always remember with the deepest affection.

It need not even be a person. It could be your pet, your little dog who goes into a frenzy of happiness each time you return home from work. It could be a place that you frequent when you want to get away from it all, and just enjoy the closeness of nature. It could be a picture you’re painting, which you consider your best effort so far. It could be a particular view you always enjoy looking at when you take the bus home each day. Just latch onto something that gives you a good feeling.

Those with religious convictions can use a religious icon – such as an image of Christ or the Buddha – to lift up their spirits and put them in the proper frame of mind when they encounter difficulties in their daily lives.

Whether you use messages or images to give yourself that inner lift, DO IT at the very start of each day and KEEP IT UP as the day progresses. Try your best not to let anything get you down.

Remember ALWAYS that each and every emotion you feel is a product of your own thoughts. That being the case, to shift an emotion that works against you – such as irritation, anger, fear and worry – simply replace the thought in your head with another.

Try repeating to yourself slowly, dwelling on the purport of the words, the following statement again and again until it sinks in deep within your consciousness: “I am always deeply relaxed, and in full control of myself in every situation.” This is a message your mind can readily accept. After all, you’re not telling yourself you can sprout wings and soar above the rooftops. What you’re telling yourself is something your mind can absorb and digest. And what your mind believes and accepts, it brings about. You’ll find that you really BECOME a person who is calm, self-collected and always in control.

The key to success when you use these methods, or any other for that matter, is CONSISTENCY. Keep at it, day by day, all your waking moments or as often as you can. The loveliest thing about this exercise is that it never wears you out. The more you practice it – and experience its effects – the more you want to indulge in it. This, you might say, is one form of addiction where the benefits are immeasurable and the ill-effects nil.

Start your day with the conviction that you are meant to be happy and that happiness is everyone’s NATURAL state. If you don’t already know this for a fact, you’ll find out the truth for yourself when you get into the habit of starting each day right and letting a positive frame of mind sustain you for the rest of your day.

 

Enjoy your day, enjoy your life!

 

 

STARTING YOUR DAY RIGHT - PART 2

Article By
KAYSOON KHOO

 

 

Now for that formula, mantra, incantation (think of it anyway you like) that you’ve been asked to recite. “Good morning, John! You are a wonderful person, and a happy and productive day awaits you!”

The very first word “good” has the most positive connotation among all the words in your entire vocabulary. It denotes the quality of every single thing you ask from Life. You treasure your good health, you want to earn a good living, you value the friendship of all your good friends, you try to be a good person – in short, “good” is the predominant colour you want to see on the canvas of your life. We're agreed on that, aren’t we? Good.

“Morning” signifies not only the start of a new day, but the start of another stretch of waking hours in which you can make the right choices. Every single passing moment gives you the opportunity to make a choice. It presents you with an option. An option to do, say, feel or THINK as you please – especially the last. NO ONE can deprive you of the freedom to plant whatever thought you want in your head. The word “morning” indicates the bright start of all these opportunities.

Never mind if you worked the night shift, went to bed at eight in the morning, and got up at three in the afternoon. Wish yourself “good morning” instead of “good afternoon”. The word “afternoon” tells you more than half the day is gone. And the afternoon is hardly the most salubrious part of the day. It simply doesn’t have the bright promise of the beginning of a new day. So stick to “morning” and IMAGINE its invigorating freshness all about you.

The next word you utter is your own name. Instill warmth and affection into your voice when you say your name. It means you love and accept yourself for what you are. So, all right, you may not be the ideal person (how many of us are?) and you may have many shortcomings (how many of us don’t?). That doesn’t mean you cannot be better than what your are right now.

Strive to improve yourself by all means, but UNLESS you can love yourself in spite of all your imperfections, you CANNOT really love anyone else. You cannot give anyone money when you don’t have a single cent to bless yourself with. In other words, if you cannot love yourself, you become a machine, something totally incapable of affection. Scary thought, isn’t it?

That’s why you have to regard yourself the right way when you speak your own name out loud. Have a high regard for that person you see in the mirror. His weal and woe are your sole responsibility. NO ONE can ever uderstand him and know him the way you do. If you don’t LOVE him, how can anyone else do so?

The next thing you tell yourself is that “you a wonderful person”. You don’t have to squirm with embarrassment when you say this, even if modesty is your middle name. You really ARE a wonderful person. For that matter, so is each and every human being who lives and breathes.

WHY are you wonderful? Consider what you are. You belong to the specie at the very top of the food chain. You are a unique creation of Nature with the special gift of intellect. You have the great privilege of choice in thought, which in turn gives you endless options to do what you wish with your life. And no one else is quite like you. There is NO exact duplicate of you in this whole word; no, not even if you have an identical twin. If all that isn’t wonderful, try to figure out what is.

The last part of the message you deliver yourself when you look in the mirror says, “A happy and productive day awaits you.” The two most significant words are, of course, “happy” and “productive”. Let’s examine each of them in turn.

Like every normal person, you want to be happy. When you tell yourself the day holds happiness in store for you, you are promising yourself you’ll generate that happiness within you throughout the day. It MUST come from the inside. Happiness is one article you cannot pick up from the shelf. You have to manufacture that product yourself if you want to enjoy it.

Neither is happiness a windfall. It’s not stepping out of your house and finding a hundred-dollar note someone has accidentally dropped. If you look at it the right way, finding a hundred-dollar note never gives as much joy and satisfaction as earning a hundred bucks through your own efforts or talent. You can pocket that money, but the knowledge that it isn’t really yours won’t go away. There will also come the gnawing thought that the person who dropped the money may not be able to afford its loss. A conscience that bothers you is not quite the ingredient to put into the pot when you want to stir up something with a happy taste.

No, that isn’t the kind of happiness you wish for yourself during the day. You wish for happy circumstance, but you do not want gain at the expense or loss of another. What you really wish for is that bright, optimistic, confident mood that lets you enjoy the challenge of your work, the company of your colleagues and everything you experience throughout the day. THAT is the happiness you ask for yourself at the start of each new day. FEEL that happiness even as you wish it on yourself.

Now, take the other word “productive”. A non-productive day is a useless day, and all the non-productive days strung together constitute a useless life. No right-thinking person wants that for himself.

As your day progresses, you want to fill your time doing things which are of benefit to yourself and others. You do just that if you devote yourself whole-heartedly to your job duties. What you do benefits the company, and what benefits the establishment you work for benefits you too. After all, you’re part and parcel of it. You want to feel that you belong to the crew of that boat in which you’re sailing, not a mere passenger. You want to help row that boat instead of sitting idly and letting others get you to your destination. That’s why you’ll find that the sense of satisfaction you derive from a good day’s work is priceless. You need neither praise nor approbation because you yourself KNOW the volume and quality of your output.

That doesn’t mean you are only productive when you keep your nose to the grindstone and your shoulder to the wheel. You also do that when you help a colleague solve a problem or give an encouraging word to another. You are helping them cope in a situation which presents difficulty for them. You are contributing. There are countless ways in which you can contribute. Just use your eyes and your brain and you’ll see them. Give and grow. Life gives everyone endless options for personal growth.

You are also being productive when you do anything which benefits yourself. Dropping in at a bar and having a beer to unwind after a hard day’s work is productive because you need that break. The same goes for a workout out at the gym. Or taking in a movie. Or making love with your partner. Or even shooting the breeze with a friend and relaxing. Enjoy yourself all the way and you’ll derive the benefit. And benefit is what productivity is all about.

You NEED all those recreational activities because they make you feel good. When you feel good, you can do more for yourself and for others. In short, you become even MORE productive.

You don’t have to be fanatical when it comes to the concept of productivity. Not everyone can feed the millions, or come up with a new invention which proves itself a boon to mankind, or make major decisions which benefit the nation at large. Just do what you have to do to the best of your ability, with the right frame of mind, and you are productive all the way.


( continued in Part 3 )